cats · daily prompt · Humor · Writing

The Acquisition of Cats

Name the most expensive personal item you’ve ever purchased (not your home or car).

There is not one, and they are not bought. How one acquires cats is this: one shows up, and hours to months to years later, another one shows up. This repeats until you have between two and four or more cats at any given time.

Cats are not items. But cats require the purchase of many items such as food they will not eat and treats they selectively eat (if you get the wrong ones, they won’t eat them either). Cat toys are bought in the hundreds, only to be left alone in favor of scraps of paper that fall off of various items: shoelaces, plastic bottle caps, and various other waste materials. Expensive cat beds are left untouched in favor of tissue paper from discarded gift boxes, warm towels inadvertently left on a surface, and your own pants left carelessly on the chair.

The litter. The litter is so expensive that it often means going without at least two items of food for yourself per week to allow its purchase. And you must purchase it – it is not only irresponsible to let your cats outside, it is dangerous for the cats. There are a number of diseases they can pick up from other cats and other animals that live outside. Cats can become badly injured in cat fights and by human cars. But let’s get back to the litter: it’s not just the cost of the litter, it’s also the human labor that goes into maintaining the litter box. My current cat will not use clumping litter, so the human staff (me) must scoop the poop every day. It is one of my more glamorous roles in the household.

Other animals require similar amounts of expense, care and investment of time, but what other animal besides the cat expects these tasks to be performed without question? And yet, it is all worth it in the end, when the cat slow blinks at you and rubs their cheeks and tails against you in a sign of ownership and affection. They are telling you that they appreciate what you do for them, that they accept you no matter what you look like, or who you are, or what you’ve done in the past. (They are also telling you that you are not permitted to stop doing any of these things. Ever.)

The acquisition of cats is materially expensive, yes, but the unconditional love that is received from the feline in exchange is more than enough currency to pay for the acquisition of a cat.

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daily prompt

Study Hall

What was your favorite subject in school?

It was closely followed by lunchtime detention, which came along as an option in high school. One small transgression, and one could end up in a quiet room with lunch served in a brown bag. No one was allowed to talk. Everyone had to read quietly. Study hall and lunchtime detention were quite similar, with the main difference being there was food at lunch. There was no sense of punishment; rather, it was quite rewarding.

It wasn’t until University that I gained interest in the subjects I was studying, and even then it took a couple of years to delve into more than generic topics. Art History, Costume History, Literature, Theatre (including Costuming) – these are a few of my favorite things.

daily prompt · Good advice

None of This Lasts

What’s something you believe everyone should know.

Enjoy people while you have them. Don’t focus on material things beyond what you need to survive and have a little cushion. Savor every second of every day because as you get older, you realize you maybe didn’t appreciate that moment at that time as much as you would, if you could do it again. No one ever wants to go back to high school, that’s why people have bad dreams about it. Learn how to love people and how to receive love. Have a pet from a young age, so that you understand what unconditional love is, and you understand how to care for something outside of yourself. If someone hurts you, you don’t get to say that they didn’t – and this goes both ways. Say you’re sorry first. Laugh every day. Say hello to people, especially the grumpy looking ones. You don’t have to forgive if you don’t want to, but try to let it go, so it doesn’t eat you up inside. It’s better for your own health than holding a grudge for life. Because this all ends.

cats · daily prompt · Humor

Cats in Ancient Egypt

What historical event fascinates you the most?

Who domesticated who? Who was the Egyptian who decided cats were to be revered? Why did everyone else agree?

Not that this person was wrong, because I am a proud cat mother, but how did this happen? There are cat memes (a.k.a. hieroglyphics) all over the Egyptian tombs. And while we’re at it, how were the pyramids made? What’s the deal with the Sphinx?

In summary, Ancient Egypt fascinates me. it’s not an event so much as it’s a time period.

PS – my cat doesn’t want me asking why or how. She says to just accept it. I tell her that I have. There is no one else in my home who lives rent free, has no job, and for whom I scoop a litter box. I think the Ancient Egyptians would understand what I’m talking about.

daily prompt · Humor

Sweaters on Candles

What does it mean to be a kid at heart?

You know, the battery powered candles people put in the windows during the winter season? They get cold, too.

Buy tiny, Christmas tree ornament sweaters and pop them over the candles’ heads (note: not to be done with real candles!). Top their plastic flame heads with a fashionable, blue- or red-colored whipped cream cap.

Obviously, before any of this seasonal adornment, you’ll have placed the googly eyes on the candles. You’ll have set them up in pairs or trios, so that the eyes watch each other. (The candles no longer live in the windows. They live in random locations throughout the house.)

You giggle when they catch your eye, and you wake up in the morning making sure they’re in the same spot as when you went to bed. And if they should by chance have moved a millimeter, you will giggle again, knowing the candles must have attended a birthday party while you were sleeping.

Candle Sans Cap