How do you deal with uncertainty?

How do you deal with uncertainty?

What’s a conspiracy theory you actually find believable?
This is not actually a conspiracy theory, this is real. I know, I know, people always say conspiracy theories are real, but I’m so for real right now. I was attempting to put a charm on a necklace yesterday, but I had to take apart the necklace. The hoop at the end was too big to fit through the charm thus deconstruction had to happen. So I’m sitting there with a magnifying glass and these tiny gold loops, I can’t see a thing, I’m trying to juggle holding the open loop with the needle nose pliers in my non-dominant hand while holding the necklace chain in my non-dominant hand when suddenly the whole thing falls apart, and I lose the open loop. Naturally, I get up and take the flashlight to look for it. I had dropped it three previous times and I found it with no problem, but on this occasion, the thing was gone. It wasn’t in my lap, it didn’t drop when I got up and it wasn’t in the couch. I looked for 20 minutes. The couch ate it. I found an old Cheerio while I was searching, but that’s too big to put on the necklace. (And obviously it’s not an edible item because the couch didn’t eat it. Caveat Emptor re: Cheerios, I guess?) The charm definitely won’t fit if I put a cheerio on the end. I tore the couch apart. I even got the vacuum out and vacuumed the entire area: nothing. I looked at the vacuum cleaner contents with the magnifying glass. Nothing.
You can say what you want, you can tell me that’s not possible, but I know my couch ate my necklace loop. I don’t know why, but I know it did.
If you had a time machine and could send just one message to your past self, what would it say?
“Relax! We have a Time Machine, which means the stupid stuff you’re doing right now is fixable. But I’m not sure that we should fix them, even though we have a Time Machine. I think we should just let it play out. Messing with outcomes just doesn’t seem right to me. Carry on, doofus!”

What’s a thing you wish schools actually taught?
But unfortunately, common sense cannot be taught. People who do not have it struggle with things you think should be basic knowledge. If you have been blessed with common sense, give thanks, because not only cannot it not be taught, it can’t be bought.

What’s a skill you consider basic, that most people don’t actually know how to do?
This is one of my pet peeves. I have many, but this is pretty high on the list. In the past, before the days of self checkout, stores used to bag your groceries. Some still do, and if you go to the regular checkout, they will put your stuff in a bag. But what they do is combine everything in one bag without the proper sorting and it makes my right eye twitch. 
Believe it or not, people who bag groceries used to be trained on how to bag groceries. I know, I know, it’s a shocker. There is actually a way to do this without putting bread in the same bag as potatoes and mothballs. Or eggs in the same bag as anything else. They also should know that all of the refrigerated items should be together in the same bag(s), and the non-refrigerated items should be placed in their own bags, further separated by cleaning products and porosity of the packaging.
To me, this is a basic skill. I don’t understand why people don’t know this. We don’t put food items in the same bag as ant traps. We don’t put cold food items in the same bag as non-refrigerated items, because the end goal here is to keep everything cold on the way home from the store, thus reducing melting and spoilage.
I often have to change the bagging entirely when I get to the car if someone else bags. It is a rare occasion I find someone who knows how to bag groceries. And yes, I still get someone else to bag my groceries because my job title is not grocery bagger and I am paying for my items. So they will bag them. That’s part of the transaction. And I use the paper bags they give me at the store because I’m paying for those bags in the cost of the items on the shelf. Thank you very much. 
On the off occasion that someone actually knows how to bag groceries, I thank them and tell them I appreciate their knowledge. And then I tell them no one else knows how to do it, because it’s true.

If you had to be an animal for a week, which one would you be and why?
Why? Because they live really well. They’re almost impossible to evict and they’re very cute. Also, they have a great defense mechanism. Just last week I saw the red fox running from my yard to the neighbor’s yard at a full clip. Why? A skunk was chasing him.
Also last week, someone set off fireworks all night long on a random Tuesday, and when they started up the next night at about 8:30 PM, I went outside in my bathrobe and pajamas to see if I could find where they were coming from. I walked to the middle of the street thinking to myself that it probably wasn’t a great idea, because the skunks come out around that time, but they only ever appear in the backyard. As I stood in the middle of the road hearing fireworks, but not seeing any, I noticed two skunks on my front porch. I was stuck in the middle of the street with my phone as a flashlight for a half an hour on a Tuesday night.
Last night I learned there was a baby skunk. Apparently the baby lives under my shed, which means there is at least also a mother under my shed. I believe the mother is Salt. The father is Pepa (although they could go the other way, I’m not sure which skunk is the male and which skunk is the female), and the baby is Spinderella. If you don’t understand this reference, they are named after the female rap group Salt ‘N Pepa, and their female DJ Spinderella.
The baby came out last night. It’s 6:30 PM, learning how to hunt for bugs. I had to chase it back to the backyard because it’s far too early for a baby skunk to be out, even though it’s normal for babies. No, it doesn’t have rabies. It does have a luxurious home, though. The babies won’t be grown until September and I won’t kick them out until then, if at all possible. But their presence means that the birds and the squirrels no longer get food.
Join me soon for another episode of Wild Kingdom!
Which outdated technology do you miss the most, and why?
Don’t get me wrong, technology is useful and important. However. I don’t think it needs to be at everyone’s fingertips twenty four hours a day. It’s too much. I’m glad I grew up in a time where we didn’t have cell phones. We played outside and we used our imaginations. I’m not saying we didn’t have video games or computers because we did, but this age of everything at your fingertips is technology overload. Constant social media interaction can be destructive. And, perhaps most importantly, technology is amazing when it’s working correctly, but when it’s not? See below.

Are you a lifelong learner?
Learning never stops. You don’t have to be enrolled in a formal education program to continue to learn your whole life. And if you’re not learning anything as the years go on, then you’re not paying attention and you’re not growing. Reading, taking classes, doing things that keep your mind active are all important to keep learning, but also living daily life teaches you lessons that you can’t find in a book or a class. Often, those are the lessons that are most impactful.
Learning keeps your brain and your body sharp. Well, maybe not sharp, but less dull. What have you learned lately?

What villain actually had a good point?

Grimace is from the McDonald’s universe. You may recognize him from his recent controversy of being revealed as a large purple taste bud. I call BS on this, McDonald’s.
I did some research and I found that Grimace started out as Evil Grimace in 1971 and had four arms so that he could steal more milkshakes. But his arms and persona scared little children so they amputated two of his arms and made him be a taste bud. Please note, I was never scared of him as a child, and I’m just not buying that other kids were scared of him. He is also Ronald McDonald’s best friend.
But make no mistake about it, Grimace is a thief. He steals milkshakes. He’s not like Hamburglar who steals hamburgers and looks suspicious and – let’s be real – is kind of weird. He’s a big purple blob who is friendly, but also will steal your milkshake. I like this about him.
I think having four arms to steal more milkshakes in the heat of the summer makes a lot of sense. (Evil) Grimace is my guy for this prompt.
🎶” My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they’re like…“🎶

What do you love now, that you hated when you were younger?
This prompt pretty much answers itself.
