blogging · daily prompt · Humor

Grocery Bagging

What’s a skill you consider basic, that most people don’t actually know how to do?

This is one of my pet peeves. I have many, but this is pretty high on the list. In the past, before the days of self checkout, stores used to bag your groceries. Some still do, and if you go to the regular checkout, they will put your stuff in a bag. But what they do is combine everything in one bag without the proper sorting and it makes my right eye twitch. 

Believe it or not, people who bag groceries used to be trained on how to bag groceries. I know, I know, it’s a shocker. There is actually a way to do this without putting bread in the same bag as potatoes and mothballs. Or eggs in the same bag as anything else. They also should know that all of the refrigerated items should be together in the same bag(s), and the non-refrigerated items should be placed in their own bags, further separated by cleaning products and porosity of the packaging.

To me, this is a basic skill. I don’t understand why people don’t know this. We don’t put food items in the same bag as ant traps. We don’t put cold food items in the same bag as non-refrigerated items, because the end goal here is to keep everything cold on the way home from the store, thus reducing melting and spoilage.

I often have to change the bagging entirely when I get to the car if someone else bags. It is a rare occasion I find someone who knows how to bag groceries. And yes, I still get someone else to bag my groceries because my job title is not grocery bagger and I am paying for my items. So they will bag them. That’s part of the transaction. And I use the paper bags they give me at the store because I’m paying for those bags in the cost of the items on the shelf. Thank you very much. 

On the off occasion that someone actually knows how to bag groceries, I thank them and tell them I appreciate their knowledge. And then I tell them no one else knows how to do it, because it’s true.

Look, I found instructions!
animals · blogging · daily prompt · Humor · Nature · Skunks

Skunks Under My Shed

If you had to be an animal for a week, which one would you be and why?

Why? Because they live really well. They’re almost impossible to evict and they’re very cute. Also, they have a great defense mechanism. Just last week I saw the red fox running from my yard to the neighbor’s yard at a full clip. Why? A skunk was chasing him.

Also last week, someone set off fireworks all night long on a random Tuesday, and when they started up the next night at about 8:30 PM, I went outside in my bathrobe and pajamas to see if I could find where they were coming from. I walked to the middle of the street thinking to myself that it probably wasn’t a great idea, because the skunks come out around that time, but they only ever appear in the backyard. As I stood in the middle of the road hearing fireworks, but not seeing any, I noticed two skunks on my front porch. I was stuck in the middle of the street with my phone as a flashlight for a half an hour on a Tuesday night.

Salt (i’m sorry if this link isn’t working – I’ve tried everything and it doesn’t seem to work. It’s such a cute video and I’m sorry you can’t see it. It won’t even load properly when I use the unedited version.)

Last night I learned there was a baby skunk. Apparently the baby lives under my shed, which means there is at least also a mother under my shed. I believe the mother is Salt. The father is Pepa (although they could go the other way, I’m not sure which skunk is the male and which skunk is the female), and the baby is Spinderella. If you don’t understand this reference, they are named after the female rap group Salt ‘N Pepa, and their female DJ Spinderella.

Salt ‘N Pepa

The baby came out last night. It’s 6:30 PM, learning how to hunt for bugs. I had to chase it back to the backyard because it’s far too early for a baby skunk to be out, even though it’s normal for babies. No, it doesn’t have rabies. It does have a luxurious home, though. The babies won’t be grown until September and I won’t kick them out until then, if at all possible. But their presence means that the birds and the squirrels no longer get food.

Spinderella

Join me soon for another episode of Wild Kingdom!

blogging · daily prompt · Humor · Technology · Uncategorized

Not Having Technology

Which outdated technology do you miss the most, and why?

Don’t get me wrong, technology is useful and important. However. I don’t think it needs to be at everyone’s fingertips twenty four hours a day. It’s too much. I’m glad I grew up in a time where we didn’t have cell phones. We played outside and we used our imaginations. I’m not saying we didn’t have video games or computers because we did, but this age of everything at your fingertips is technology overload. Constant social media interaction can be destructive. And, perhaps most importantly, technology is amazing when it’s working correctly, but when it’s not? See below.

Actual footage of me on a typical Monday
blogging · books · daily prompt · Humor · Learning

Who Isn’t?

Are you a lifelong learner?

Learning never stops. You don’t have to be enrolled in a formal education program to continue to learn your whole life. And if you’re not learning anything as the years go on, then you’re not paying attention and you’re not growing. Reading, taking classes, doing things that keep your mind active are all important to keep learning, but also living daily life teaches you lessons that you can’t find in a book or a class. Often, those are the lessons that are most impactful.

Learning keeps your brain and your body sharp. Well, maybe not sharp, but less dull. What have you learned lately?

blogging · daily prompt · Humor

(Evil) Grimace

What villain actually had a good point?

More Arms, More Shakes

Grimace is from the McDonald’s universe. You may recognize him from his recent controversy of being revealed as a large purple taste bud. I call BS on this, McDonald’s.

I did some research and I found that Grimace started out as Evil Grimace in 1971 and had four arms so that he could steal more milkshakes. But his arms and persona scared little children so they amputated two of his arms and made him be a taste bud. Please note, I was never scared of him as a child, and I’m just not buying that other kids were scared of him. He is also Ronald McDonald’s best friend.

But make no mistake about it, Grimace is a thief. He steals milkshakes. He’s not like Hamburglar who steals hamburgers and looks suspicious and – let’s be real – is kind of weird. He’s a big purple blob who is friendly, but also will steal your milkshake. I like this about him.

I think having four arms to steal more milkshakes in the heat of the summer makes a lot of sense. (Evil) Grimace is my guy for this prompt.

🎶” My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they’re like…“🎶

Nothing to see here…
blogging · daily prompt · Humor

The Hard Stuff: Melatonin

What do you do to improve your sleep?

This was definitely a previous prompt, and I know I have the visuals saved in the media library.

*heads to the library, starts rummaging*

While I look for my previous post’s visuals, I have to say that melatonin gives some crazy dreams and it doesn’t always work in terms of improving sleep. It does help me to fall asleep, but it doesn’t necessarily lead to me staying asleep. And while I’m sleeping, I’m having crazy dreams. Like last night. I don’t know if it’s because of this extreme heat and that I was outside in, it or if it was strictly the melatonin side effect, but I had dreams that were off the charts weird. Of course I cannot remember them now. So I guess I would recommend trying melatonin to help one fall asleep faster, but not necessarily to improve sleep.

I highly recommend the gummy version, as it is a delicious way to fall asleep.

Typical accuracy rate
blogging · books · daily prompt · fantasy · favorite author · history · Outlander · reading · tv show · Writing

Outlander

What’s a book, movie, or TV show that you wish you could experience again for the first time?

I read the books years ago (and they are not yet finished being written by Diana Gabaldon), and waited not very patiently for it to be picked up as a TV show or a movie. When it finally was picked up by STARZ, and became a series in 2013, I was very excited. I have watched every season and the final season just aired, with the last episode being in May. It feels like it’s been a year and a half since the last episode, but it’s only been a little over a month? This last season was trash, in my opinion. They “jumped the shark,” as the old saying goes. It’s like the interns wrote the last season. Out of order. And with no prior knowledge of any of the books or previous seasons. But I digress.

The funny thing about reading is if you wait long enough and you reread a book, it’s almost like reading it again for the first time. It’s different with TV shows. I think the visual memory is wired differently in the brain, and although you can rewatch something and not remember everything, visually you do start to have memories and there’s that part of your brain that tells you “Ahh, yes, this is why I love this show.” At least, that’s what I have found to be the case. Not that I don’t occasionally start over at season one of Outlander, because I do. But it’s just not the same as the first time I watched it. The novelty is gone, but the affection remains.

Je Suis Prest (to re-watch Outlander!)
Sing me a song of a lass that is gone…
blogging · daily prompt · Humor · Writing

Indiana Jones

Emperor Palpatine has announced open elections for a new Emperor — and he’s nominated Darth Vader. You get to nominate one challenger.

I said what I said. Yes, I know he was Han Solo, and that I have crossed out of the Star Wars Universe into the Indiana Jones Universe, but 👏I 👏said 👏what👏 I 👏said👏

As a challenger to the creepy heavy breather, who looks like walking chicken skin with a hairdryer mouth, my candidate can do the following:

Math:

Here you see math

He has critical thinking skills:

Hmm…

He can outrun big boulders, unlike the nominee, who probably can’t outrun a piece of gravel, let’s be honest…

Indieeee!

I shouldn’t have to convince you – you either think he’s cool or you’re wrong. And if you like Darth Vader for this job, I can’t help you. There is no universe in which Darth Vader is a better ruler than Indiana Jones. None!

Can Darth Vader do this? Exactly.

Finally, I would like to wish a very happy early birthday to my birthday twin, Mr. Harrison Ford!

🎂👫🎉

May the force be with you all, but only if you vote for Indiana Jones!