List your top 5 grocery store items.

5 golden rings (is that my phone or yours?)

4 calling birds (it *was* my phone! Why are birds calling me at the grocery store?)

3 French hens (fancy birds, oui?)

2 turtle doves (look, I have enough game in my grocery cart already, I don’t need any turtle doves, whatever they are.)

A partridge in a pear tree (I already have 9 birds in this cart! And how am I going to fit an entire pear tree in here?!)

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$14,587.42 (and my cart has directionally challenged wheels)