daily prompt · Writing

There Are Two

Daily writing prompt
What is one question you hate to be asked? Explain.

The first one is, “Why aren’t you married?” My standard answer is, “I’ve never met anyone who could convince me that it’s a good idea.” That shuts them up really quickly.

The second question I hate is, “Why don’t you have children?” Again, I reply with, “I’ve never met anyone who could convince me that it’s a good idea.” Again, silence.

It’s my standard answer. It’s flippant and sarcastic and intentional. Come at me with questions that are none of your business, and I’m going to come at you with something you have no response to.

We know nothing of lost opportunities, missed chances, wrong time, wrong place, right person, wrong time, wrong person, right time. we know nothing of desire – or lack of desire – for marriage or children. And there’s a reason why we don’t know anything: because these are personal issues.

Last week, one of the cashiers in the grocery store told me I looked really fashionable. She said she always loves to see what outfit I’m wearing. This particular trip I had on my plaid black and white fedora, with my houndstooth belted coat and matching houndstooth gloves. Finished off with tall black boots. She asked, “You’re not married are you?” Immediately, my defenses went up, but I asked with a smile, “Why do you say that?” And she said, “Because you look so put together and cute. You’re a cutie pie and you take time with your outfits and always look adorable.” I thanked her and put my defenses down. (I’m not sure what that had to do with being married or unmarried, but it was said, from a place of kindness.)

I like those kinds of people. Not because she complimented me, but because she didn’t ask me a personal question to be nosy or critical. She had no ulterior motive.

We don’t know what people go through, what battles they are waging on the inside. We should always strive to be kind and never assume anything.

And never assume a void means lack of hopes, dreams or wishes.

38 thoughts on “There Are Two

  1. I spent many years working in a used clothing store. A lady came in, I greeted her. As I did all of our customers. She must have been lonely or something; after that, I couldn’t shut her up. The conversation turned to me. She noted that I didn’t have a wedding ring on. Nope. Then she asked if I was a mother. Nope. Then starts the barrage of whys. At this point, I was aggravated and simply tired of her. I said flatly, “I know where babies come from and I know how to stop them.” Well, you would have thought I smacked her directly across the face. She puffed up like a toad frog. Come to think of it. I don’t think she ever came back to the store.

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    1. Thanks Edward. Yes that’s absolutely the worst question to ask. I actually know someone who asked a woman that question and the answer was no. I have found 99% of the time, assumptions are not the way to go.

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  2. So get what you are saying. It is hard if you choose not to have children in this world. Got to the point where I tried to avoid the subject because of all the verbal abuse about deciding not to have children. Wouldn’t mention this anywhere else to this day. I don’t think you should argue or campaign about a subject you have no idea about either. It is sort of just being nosy your right!!!

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    1. I appreciate your comment and sharing your point of view. I agree, it really is being nosy. People have no clue why someone doesn’t have children. Is it by choice or is it by circumstance? In the end, it’s no one’s business.

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