Humor · Writing

Dating

Are there any activities or hobbies you’ve outgrown or lost interest in over time?

Am I being serious? Yes and no.

I’m at a point in my life where I wear my bathrobe to get the mail. I answer to no one but myself. I’m sorry, that’s incorrect: I answer to the cat.

After a lifetime of not making the best decisions, I’ve backed off. What I learned in childhood taught me how to choose the absolute worst partners. Thanks, dad!

After a recent relationship ended, I decided that I would no longer be actively taking applications. It’s not that the job was filled, it’s that we’ve pulled the job off the market due to a poor candidate pool. Time to go within and heal what is wrong so I stop making bad choices.

Besides all that, casual dating is not fun for me. I don’t like it. I would rather get to know one person very well, not know a bunch of people not so well.

I’m thinking of a phrase here. I think it’s a meme. There are several iterations of it. It goes something like, “I like to be alone, but I want someone that I can be alone with who also likes to be alone.”

Yeah, that. And they have to be OK with me wearing my bathrobe to the mailbox. Because I’m not going to stop doing that.

I’ve asked the universe/God to stop sending me the wrong things. I am done with the tests. I get it. I know where I went wrong. Or if I don’t know, I’m working on it. Stop sending me somebody’s dusty ass son, universe. Please and thank you.

Oh, one last thing: I will never give up my writing again for anyone or anything.

The two songs I thought of when I was answering this prompt are: Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri, and The Chain by Fleetwood Mac. Both of these songs are my jams.

Jar of Hearts

I know I can’t take one more step towards you
‘Cause all that’s waiting is regret
Don’t you know I’m not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live half alive
Now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
Tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you’re asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I’ve learned to live half alive
Now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
Tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?

It took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you’re back
You don’t get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
Tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
Tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Barrett Yeretsian / Christina Perri / Drew Lawrence

Jar of Hearts lyrics © Wb Music Corp., Bmg Gold Songs, Philosophy Of Sound Publishing, Piggy Dog Music, Hipgnosis Sfh I Limited

🎶

The Chain

Listen to the wind blow, watch the sun rise
Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies

And if you don’t love me now 
You will never love me again
I can still hear you saying
You would never break the chain (never break the chain)

And if you don’t love me now (you don’t love me now)
You will never love me again
I can still hear you saying (still hear you saying)
You would never break the chain (never break the chain)

Listen to the wind blow, down comes the night
Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies
Break the silence, damn the dark, damn the light

And if you don’t love me now
You will never love me again
I can still hear you saying
You would never break the chain (never break the chain)

And if you don’t love me now (you don’t love me now)
You will never love me again
I can still hear you saying (still hear you saying)
You would never break the chain (never break the chain)

And if you don’t love me now (you don’t love me now)
You will never love me again
I can still hear you saying (still hear you saying)
You would never break the chain (never break the chain)

Chain keep us together (running in the shadow)
Chain keep us together (running in the shadow)
Chain keep us together (running in the shadow)
Chain keep us together (running in the shadow)
Chain keep us together (running in the shadow)
Chain

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Christine McVie / John McVie / Lindsey Buckingham / Mick Fleetwood / Stephanie Nicks

The Chain lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Hipgnosis Songs Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Reach Music Publishing, Universal Music Publishing Group

chick lit · fiction · Humor · tennis · Women’s literature · Writing

Book In Hand

My perfect day, from start to finish, was the day I received the first batch of my book in the mail. A close second was doing book signings. The process of writing a novel took much longer than one day, of course, and it wasn’t perfect, but the feeling of handling a solid book that contained words I strung together, was unlike any other feeling previously or since. I could think of other ways to spend a perfect day, but none as profound as this for me, as a lover of words.

I started writing this book in 2003, and the idea formed over a fairly short span of time. I have been a tennis fan since the age of 15, and I am not going to tell you how many years ago that was, but it was approximately 102 years prior to 2003.

When I write, I see images. I see the scene playing out between the characters, where they are, what they’re wearing, their facial expressions, if the air is still or breezy, hot or chilly, and I see it start to finish just as a film or on a real in my brain.

The novel started with a small seed of an idea that turned into an image in my brain. The scene was the end of the book. I hand wrote most of this book in a black, hardbound canvas covered book that was probably meant to be a journal. I have journaled my whole life and I have written my whole life as well, although not for public consumption.

So the image that I saw in my head of the scene, playing out of the end of the novel, I wrote at a feverous pitch, on the first page of my black bound book. I then had to form character names, settings, and all the good stuff that goes along with novel writing. Which I had never done before. I bought books, I researched how to outline, but basically I winged it. I wrote the novel in about three months. The scenes played in my mind, and I was able to extricate the best out of the story that I could. I edited and re-edited the novel. I pitched my manuscript to agents and publishing houses for a full year of my life. I had some interest but never any yeses. Frustrated and emotional as I was, I refused to accept defeat. I decided to self publish. Back in 2005, when I finally got past trying to find a publisher and an agent, self publishing wasn’t as acceptable as it is these days. Nor was it as accessible. It was, however, much more affordable. I chose to use lulu.com, which probably was due to the fact that that was one of the only self publishing houses available at the time. Uploading the novel was a fairly simple process. I chose the cover, the font type, the color of the font, and the cover is from stock image. Formatting the pages was a bit difficult and the first print proof of the book was too many pages, too large of a font, not the right cover, not the right title or font – not the right anything.

So, I went back to the drawing board and finessed it into what it is now. I paid extra for the international ability to sell on Amazon, and once I received the first shipment of books myself, I couldn’t believe that I had done this. I had a book with an ISBN and it was registered at the Library of Congress and it was available for sale on websites. I held this bound grouping of words in my hands, and it came out of my brain. It was surreal.

Because I did not have an agent I had to hustle my own promotions. I held book signings at local bookstores, I made sure all local bookstores had copies of my book from the warehouse, I promoted it as much as I could through word-of-mouth and through online sales. Shortly after I wrote the book and launched it, I switched careers that involved a lot of training, and the creative part of my brain went dormant. I am still in the career that I switched to all these years later, but I have recently found joy in writing again. I owe it to a muse I found in the most peculiar place. I lost my muse long ago, so to find another one in a weird place, and completely unexpectedly was a shock and a joy. So thank you muse, and I will see you at the park in 2033. Until then, I’m pondering ideas for a second book, but I have no solid kernels on which to build yet. For now I continue with daily prompts, poetry and short stories, about some of my favorite things, which include Paris, cats, dogs, pigeons on the lamb, and Sometimes relationships.

For those of you who have considered writing a novel, or working on a novel, or have finished a novel, what are your experiences with the process? For example, I started at the end and worked my way back to the beginning. I worked pen and paper. I edited my own book with the pages looking like a murder scene had taken place. There was so much red pen. I didn’t tell anyone I was writing a book until I was done the book. I felt like it would be breaking a spell I was under. For me when I write I get in a zone. Does anyone else experience that? What are your experiences as you are writing whether you are working on a novel or another piece? Please comment below!

*I originally posted links to my book on a separate page on WordPress, but it has disappeared. I don’t think WordPress likes tennis.*

My baby

Love Match is available here:

https://www.lulu.com/shop/amy-j-bates/love-match/paperback/product-261924.html?page=1&pageSize=4

And here:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1411664752/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?ie=UTF8&qid=1707127147&sr=8-1

The song I thought of today is Unwritten, by Natasha Bedingfield.

I am unwritten
Can’t read my mind
I’m undefined
I’m just beginning
The pen’s in my hand
Ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition
Sometimes my tries are outside the lines
We’ve been conditioned to not make mistakes
But I can’t live that way

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, yeah, yeah

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Danielle A. Brisebois / Natasha Anne Bedingfield / Wayne Steven Jr Rodrigues

Unwritten lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

daily prompt · Humor

It’s In My Head

Write about your first computer.

I’ve had it forever

Ever since I can remember

It still works

Sometimes it’s a little slow

With basic tasks

But it can pull up an obscure song lyric

From 30 years ago

Instantly

My best friend’s landline phone number from 1990?

Retrieved

Don’t ask it to do math

But if you need spellcheck,

Done and dusted

It’s the original model

It’s called vintage

Look it up on your own computer

I’m definitely keeping it

forever

©️2024 itsamyisaid.com

Powering on for the day. Ignore the smoke.
daily prompt · Humor · tennis

Interpretive Dance

What are your favorite sports to watch and play?

…is how I will be answering this question. Just kidding. It’s tennis. This prompt has been asked and answered before. I have nothing new to add. Maybe I could play tennis while performing interpretive dance? But not today. For now, my responses to previous prompts are below. Happy Monday!

I responded here

and I’ll just throw this one in for fun

Then there was this response

Actual photo*, taken in Cincinnati

*ha

©️2024 itsamyisaid.com, all rights reserved

chronic migraine · daily prompt · Humor · Writing

I Battle Chronic Migraine

What do you enjoy doing most in your leisure time?

A tongue in cheek title, but it’s a serious post today, folks. I received a spam comment from a “life-of-the-party” type telling me that WordPress can easily access all of my information and surely I could make up some stories. Well, clearly this person doesn’t read my blog at all, which means I take little value from the statement. But they do have a point. Much to the spammer’s chagrin, today I won’t be making up a story or writing a poem. nor will I be performing interpretive dance.

In my leisure time I enjoy battling migraine. In my workday, I battle migraine. When I’m writing a story, I battle migraine. It’s a war, made up of many battles. Some battles migraine wins, and some I do.

I wear purple battle armor

I’ve suffered from migraine since I was 12 years old. I’m going to scream this from the rooftops: migraine is not a headache, although that is the most commonly known symptom of migraine. Many symptoms accompany migraine. And there are many types of migraine. I started out with the headache type when I was 12. And then progressed to the aura which is followed by headache as a young adult. Then I got slammed with the shadiest, dirtiest, low down piece of crap migraine I’ve ever had: vestibular migraine. Vestibular migraine is characterized by vertigo, which is the sensation of spinning. It is also characterized by a rocking boat sensation, where you don’t have balance and you walk funny. A headache, sweating, stomach upset, vomiting, tinnitus, and a host of other unusual symptoms are also seen with this type of migraine. This migraine seems to be chronic for me. I live with it every day, all day. Migraines are often genetic. They can also be traumatic brain injury induced. Migraine is a neurological condition, not a headache. There are several types of migraine, and some of them are quite shocking. They are all beasts.

Types of migraine

I consider myself a bad ass for dealing with this shit every single day of my life, continuing to work and trying to live a somewhat normal life. Having vertigo for over 24 hours and throwing up nonstop, ending with a trip to the ER, where they can’t help, is not something I would wish on any enemy that I would ever have – infinitum. Many of my family members have migraine of varying types, severity and chronic states. If you line up my family members next to each other, put on a blindfold, move to the side, wave your arms around in front of your face, you will poke every single one of my family members in the nose and yes, you will have poked a migraineur.

What causes or exacerbates it? Having a brain. Also, the barometer rising, the barometer falling, the barometer being too high, being dehydrated, not getting enough sleep, getting too much sleep, too much stress, not enough exercise, turning your head wrong, these are all things I can bring on a vestibular migraine for me which, as I explained is chronic. It’s running in the background in my code. It comes to the forefront when it wants.

I have medication, but they don’t work quite as well as they should, and it’s always about tweaking the medications for us chronic migraineurs. You cannot cure migraine. Migraine is a neurological condition. It is controllable. For me, medication is essential. CBT and other types of behavioral therapies help. Vestibular rehabilitation exercises help. Getting up out of bed when you feel like you’re going throw up yet again and you can’t stop spinning helps. But imagine having to do that every day.

This is key to understanding

I don’t expect to ever be cured of this, and I don’t expect anyone to understand how you can be completely disabled at times by something you can’t see. But people who have an invisible condition or disability will understand what I’m talking about. What I do in my leisure time is I fight migraine. It is a war. I will fight to the death.

In my other free time I poke fun at Blahganuary, because I can create. I write stories and poems because I am a creative. There’s a section of my brain that isn’t filled with misfiring neurotransmitters and conductivity overstimulation or hypersensitivity. The calm area is where I get into the writing zone and chill.. I just also happen to have a chronic neurological condition that at times is disabling. I never let it win, and I never will.

While I was writing this piece using dictation, WordPress heard me say vestibular wrong. It typed out “Mr. Buler.“

(“Buehler? Beuhler? Buehler?” anyone?)

So to WordPress, thank you. I now have a nickname for my condition. When it acts up, as it is known to do, I will tell Mr. Buler he can kick rocks. I may even say it out loud in public, just for fun. “Mr. Buler, could you not have stayed home today? I mean, you didn’t even bring your battle gear. I have mine. And I’m going to use it.”

©️2024, itsamyisaid.com, All Rights Reserved.

June is Migraine Awareness month
daily prompt · Humor · Writing

Want My Passwords, Too?

Name an attraction or town close to home that you still haven’t got around to visiting.

Why don’t you tell us some attractions or towns close to your home, Blahganuary? Hmm? Where would you like to visit? What do you like to do for fun? What is your mother’s maiden name? Post your password and I’ll tell you if it’s strong enough or not. What’s your date of birth? In which city were you born? What are your distinguishing features? Touch the screen so I can read your fingerprints. What’s unusual about your middle name? Do you live near the beach? Do you have a car? What’s your phone number? What’s the name of your favorite bank? What is your routing number? What about your signature makes it unique? Show us.

daily prompt · Humor

“It’s Amy,” I said.

Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.

Wow. Easy prompt. OK, bye. See you guys later.

Just kidding.

(“Amie) What you want to do?”

It’s the first thing that comes to my mind when I think about this prompt. Often, I sing my thoughts. I also randomly sing lyrics all day long, and wonder why I can remember obscure things such as song lyrics from 40 years ago, but not where I put a paperclip five minutes prior. But I digress.

The name Amy means “beloved” in Latin. It’s an old name. It also has French origins. The spelling differs greatly, the meaning remains quite the same. The spelling of my name was given to me for a specific purpose: ease of learning how to spell my first name. And it worked. As I’ve gotten older, my handwriting has gotten sloppier, and now I can sign my signature in .3 seconds. It looks like I’ve gone to the school where doctors learn how to sign their signatures.

Researching this topic, I found what are apparently the top 20 songs with the name Amy in them. I find this claim a bit dubious. I only know two of these songs, and the song that I know quite well doesn’t appear on the list.

Maybe some of you have heard of the song by Pure Prairie League called “Amie.” It’s not heard on the radio very often, but sometimes it airs in the grocery store, and I start dancing and singing and proclaiming, “This is my jam!” in the middle of aisle six.

Amie

I can see why you think you belong to me
I never tried to make you think, or let you see one thing for yourself
But now you’re off with someone else and I’m alone
You see I thought that I might keep you for my own

Amie what you want to do?
I think I could stay with you
For a while, maybe longer if I do

Don’t you think the time is right for us to find
All the things we thought weren’t proper could be right in time
And can you see
Which way we should turn together or alone
I can never see what’s right or what is wrong
(will it take to long to see)

Amie what you want to do?
I think I could stay with you
For a while, maybe longer if I do

Well now
Amie what you want to do?
I think I could stay with you
For a while, maybe longer if I do

Now it’s come to what you want you’ve had your way
And all the things you thought before just faded into gray
And can you see
That I don’t know if it’s you or if it’s me
If it’s one of us I’m sure we’ll both will see
Won’t you look at me and tell me

Amie what you want to do?
I think I could stay with you
For a while, maybe longer
Longer if I do

Yeah now
Amie what you want to do?
I think I could stay with you
For a while, maybe longer if I do

Fallin’ in and out of love with you
Fallin’ in and out of love with you
Don’t know what I’m gonna do, I’d keep
Fallin’ in and out of love
With you

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Craig Lee Fuller

Amie (Remastered 1988) lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc

And here is the list of the top 20 songs with the name Amy in them. Admittedly, “Amy, Amy, Amy,” by Amy Winehouse is also my jam, but this song is never heard on the radio, so my interpretive dance, and quality* singing are relegated to the confines of my home. Which is a good thing for society.

(*quality is in the eye of the off–key beholder)

Singersroom.com

I have not listened to all of these songs. Anyone who listens to them, please leave in the comments your favorite. Or if you’ve even heard of any of these songs, please let me know. If you know the song by Pure Prairie League, let me know if you like it or not.

I wish everyone a beloved day.

©️2024, itsamyisaid.com, All Rights Reserved.