I think she did. I’ve told her to stay off the laptop numerous times. Usually she types something like, “bfnthrhfbdvrkihgdbd,” but I see this time she’s given it some thought
Well, it looks like she’s conducting a poll, and will be utilizing this information to convince me to buy the larger size of beef treats.
(She doesn’t know I bought the large bag of chicken-flavored treats, so I hope you understand that your answer to the question will be recorded and used at a later date.)
Cat owners (“staff”) will understand what I mean about the cat hair thing. I not only wear it, I eat it. It also regularly gets into my eyes, where it lives for days at a time, hugging my eyeball until it decides to release its grasp. Eyedrops don’t help loosen the grip, but they do add more tears to the already tearful eye.
Working from home affords the luxury of wearing a robe most of the day – OK, all of the day. Robe is the new sweater. Cat owners (“staff”) will also understand that you can’t wear a robe without wearing cat hair on your robe.
It seems as if our friend Daily Prompt has had some type of family drama occur this past weekend. Perhaps it was the Thanksgiving holiday, if Daily Prompt celebrates, that led to this question of loyalty among people. Did Daily Prompt experience a falling out? I suppose we will never know, but I hope Daily Prompt returns to us tomorrow with spirits renewed.
Here’s an old photo of my cat, Bubba. Because cats make everything better. Feel better soon, Daily Prompt.
What part of your routine do you always try to skip if you can?
Mondays have a notorious reputation, which I have found most weeks to be a correct assessment of the day. I can’t explain this phenomenon, but Monday front loads most of the issues of the week and makes them unavoidable, rarely ever seen on another weekday.
I’ve tried to take Monday off, so that Tuesday is the new Monday, but Monday will have none of it. Skipping Monday to try to do Tuesday first does nothing but bring Monday types of problems and situations to an innocent day.
Monday never disappoints in its sheer audacity to present conundrums and issues that would cause any other day of the week to run and hide.
Mondays are made for things that could’ve been said in an email and multiple synchronous situations that can only be described as, “What the hell is this crap?”
Skipping this routine called Monday is impossible. You will find a smug Monday on a naive Tuesday if you try to skip it. It’s better to go with the flow, and by flow, I mean your piping will burst on a Monday when it was fine on a Sunday, and will be fixed by a Tuesday, but I digress…
Name the most expensive personal item you’ve ever purchased (not your home or car).
There is not one, and they are not bought. How one acquires cats is this: one shows up, and hours to months to years later, another one shows up. This repeats until you have between two and four or more cats at any given time.
Cats are not items. But cats require the purchase of many items such as food they will not eat and treats they selectively eat (if you get the wrong ones, they won’t eat them either). Cat toys are bought in the hundreds, only to be left alone in favor of scraps of paper that fall off of various items: shoelaces, plastic bottle caps, and various other waste materials. Expensive cat beds are left untouched in favor of tissue paper from discarded gift boxes, warm towels inadvertently left on a surface, and your own pants left carelessly on the chair.
The litter. The litter is so expensive that it often means going without at least two items of food for yourself per week to allow its purchase. And you must purchase it – it is not only irresponsible to let your cats outside, it is dangerous for the cats. There are a number of diseases they can pick up from other cats and other animals that live outside. Cats can become badly injured in cat fights and by human cars. But let’s get back to the litter: it’s not just the cost of the litter, it’s also the human labor that goes into maintaining the litter box. My current cat will not use clumping litter, so the human staff (me) must scoop the poop every day. It is one of my more glamorous roles in the household.
Other animals require similar amounts of expense, care and investment of time, but what other animal besides the cat expects these tasks to be performed without question? And yet, it is all worth it in the end, when the cat slow blinks at you and rubs their cheeks and tails against you in a sign of ownership and affection. They are telling you that they appreciate what you do for them, that they accept you no matter what you look like, or who you are, or what you’ve done in the past. (They are also telling you that you are not permitted to stop doing any of these things. Ever.)
The acquisition of cats is materially expensive, yes, but the unconditional love that is received from the feline in exchange is more than enough currency to pay for the acquisition of a cat.
Who domesticated who? Who was the Egyptian who decided cats were to be revered? Why did everyone else agree?
Not that this person was wrong, because I am a proud cat mother, but how did this happen? There are cat memes (a.k.a. hieroglyphics) all over the Egyptian tombs. And while we’re at it, how were the pyramids made? What’s the deal with the Sphinx?
In summary, Ancient Egypt fascinates me. it’s not an event so much as it’s a time period.
PS – my cat doesn’t want me asking why or how. She says to just accept it. I tell her that I have. There is no one else in my home who lives rent free, has no job, and for whom I scoop a litter box. I think the Ancient Egyptians would understand what I’m talking about.
You know, the battery powered candles people put in the windows during the winter season? They get cold, too.
Buy tiny, Christmas tree ornament sweaters and pop them over the candles’ heads (note: not to be done with real candles!). Top their plastic flame heads with a fashionable, blue- or red-colored whipped cream cap.
Obviously, before any of this seasonal adornment, you’ll have placed the googly eyes on the candles. You’ll have set them up in pairs or trios, so that the eyes watch each other. (The candles no longer live in the windows. They live in random locations throughout the house.)
You giggle when they catch your eye, and you wake up in the morning making sure they’re in the same spot as when you went to bed. And if they should by chance have moved a millimeter, you will giggle again, knowing the candles must have attended a birthday party while you were sleeping.
Susie is a brown tabby with a big belly. She’s sassy, demanding, affectionate, and she loves yogurt. She’s got short little legs, but she’s super fast. She is fifteen and a half. She looks and acts about eight. Her favorite toys are pieces of scrap paper, despite the hundreds of cat toys collected over the years for her, her two brothers and her mother, who have all passed on. Only Susie remains. She is attentive and loving. She is my best girl and my favorite boss. I am fairly certain I am her favorite employee.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to tend to Her Majesty’s litter box.
“It's Amy,” I said. 